these are excerpts from an essay by Elisabeth A. Behnke called 'Matching'. She is a phenomenologist of the body who works to generate a synthesis of the knowledge offered by various somatic and embodiment practices. (taken from: Bone, Breath, and Gesture: Practices of Embodiment).

here she speaks of a physical practice that can be applied to any mode of experience - this has been a major part of my resolution of perceived duality between acceptance and change. by becoming an active participant in the pattern that one is accepting, claiming the decision, and enacting the pattern mindfully and maintaining awareness of the experience as it unfolds, we bring ourselves into accord with self - body mind will desire are unified and the innate intelligence of our being is allowed to start self-correcting in a way that it cannot while we are in denial of the reality of the moment.

In it's most schematic form, the matching technique consists of three parts:(1) awareness of something in one's own body; (2) an inner act of matching or aligning oneself with this; and (3) allowing something to change. In actual practice these can flow together but i will comment on them separately for the moment.
(1) Matching presupposes there there is something there to match, some feature of my bodily experience -- such as a shape, a feeling, or a movement -- of which i am aware. This seems obvious, but deserves mention due to the widespread impoverishment of the experience of one's own body in our culture. As numerous writers have indicated, the ability of many people in Western society to experience their own bodily feeling is profoundly impaired. Matching can help to recover and improve the capacity for somatic perception (by which i mean somaesthetic / kinaesthetic / proprioceptive experience in general),... I will assume that i can indeed feel at least some of my own body from within, simply by turning my awareness towards the shape of my limbs in space, the quality of tonus in this or that part of my body, the sense of my movement being free or restricted, and so on and so forth.
Let us say, then, that i decide to practice matching. Perhaps i begin by setting aside whatever i am doing and allowing the feeling of my own body to come more fully to awareness. I do not *try* to relax or correct my posture in any way, but simply let myself be conscious of whatever there is to feel, just as it is, welcoming it with a calm, 'oh, how interesting' attitude rather than a critical, fault-finding attitude. Typically, something or other will stand out -- a feeling of tightness somewhere in my body, for example, or an awareness of a particular shape, such as the feeling of one shoulder being higher than the other or the feeling of my upper torso being slightly turned to the left. Sometimes, the tightness will loosen up, the shoulder will drop down, or the torso will untwist of it's own accord - once i have noticed what is going on. At other times, I can easily change whatever it is that i have discovered -- realizing, for example, that i have scrunched myself up while doing a particular task and am now uncoiling with relief. But there are also times when the shape or the feeling if tightness is *just there*. It persists. It is, quite literally, the shape i am in; it is the way i feel, whether i like it or not.
(2) At this point, there are various things i can do. I can try a variety of relaxation techniques, or i can stretch, or massage the tight area, and so on. But in matching, I do not try to change the shape or the tightness: i match it. This does not mean, for instance, that i consciously try to tighten this area still further, as with some relaxation exercises. Instead I *enter* the shape or tightness, feeling it from within as clearly as i am able, and i begin to *appropriate* it as something I myself am doing - tightening myself in precisely here, or holding myself in exactly that shape.
What is crucial is that even if in fact i cannot voluntarily change the shape or feeling at this moment, I can pretend that i am maintaining it on purpose, just as it is. Perhaps i imagine that i am an artist's model, and must deliberately maintain this configuration (this shape and quality of tonus) for a few moments while the artist sketches or photographs me. This does not mean that i imagine what i look like from the outside; instead, i get in touch with the *feeling* of holding the pose and i consciously *inhabit* this feeling, putting myself into the position, as it were, of the active doer of whatever it is that produces this felt shape and this quality of felt tonus in my body. I match it -- but i do not try to control it. I simply *join with it*, not as a static fact, but as something ongoing, something that is continuing to be just this way. And I do so not from the vantage point of a spectator, but from that of a participant.
(3) What happens when I do this? Sometimes, nothing happens. But often, what happens is that I feel myself spontaneously shifting, releasing, or reorganizing myself in a slightly different way, with a new shape and a new body feeling. The change often seems to be directly related to whatever it was i was matching: a tightness eases, a stuck place begins to come unstuck, ect. At other times, however, a shift will take place somewhere else in my body than in the area i was matching. Yet whatever happens, it generally seems to be a move in the direction of greater openness and ease. If I want, I can go on to match this shape and feeling, and see if this leads to further organization. But for matching to work, I must be genuinely focused each time on simply matching what is there; trying for a specific outcome only gets in the way. Thus I have to allow myself time just to feel whatever presents itself and to match it just as it is, rather than immediately trying to 'fix' it or getting caught up in comparisons between the way things are and the way i think they should be.
One can, of course, use the "golden moments' of bodily awareness to try out new organizations of one's body, first sensing what is there and then consciously changing into a new configuration. But the matching technique I am describing is a process in which one allows oneself to change spontaneously, rather than attempting to direct the process in a particular way. Sometimes the shift will be a familiar one; I may even get what i expect. If, however, I am able to set aside my specific expectations about what will happen nest and my desire to control what is going to happen, the spontaneous shifts can be a suprise as well as a delight.
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One of the most pervasive features of contemporary experience might be termed the *I-it* structure of bodily experience. This structure can take on many forms, ranging from the "notion that perhaps oneself and one's body are two separate entities" to a tendency to organize one's perception of one's own body as though I, the perceiving self, am *up here* (in my head) while my own body, the thing perceived, is *down there* with (my foot being further away than, say, my shoulders).... But when I *enter* this shape, joining with it, aligning myself with it, as if I were doing it on purpose, the whole structure of the experience shifts: the shape is transformed into a gesture I am participating in... I can begin to let the *me*-ness flow more fully into the whole of me.
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she goes on to discussing variations and possibilities and the limitations of self-help as the assumptions we are basing our functioning on can be buried so deeply as to be simply not present in our awareness. she expands this beyond the somatic to emotion and behavior, and then further to the transpersonal as we experientially integrate within group dynamics...

This all is true and not true for me, and non dualistic.
I think trust in awareness, or Conscious Relating is the key...